unsure. perfect for what im feeling now. i dont know what i want. i do know what i want. I DONT KNOW. i just read all of those stupid entrys on this thing, and i feel so.. betrayed, so.. used... so weak. weak. i feel weak. it hurts because i loved that boy, with every piece of my heart, with every inch of my soul. and here i am, without him. alone.

by myself.

never good enough.

i hate myself.

but i know that one day ill rise above, and why is that i keep thinking im living in denial? i guess its just a way to get by. damn. im so confused, how can something like that.. just be gone. IM STILL ON THIS SHIT AND ITS BEEN MONTHS SINCE WE'VE BEEN APART. FUCKING MONTHS. can you believe it? what does this mean. what does this fucking mean. why is it taking me so long, to get over him. he's changed so much, i hate the person he is now. i hate him. but i love him. more than he ever knew, more than he'll ever know.

theres nothing left to say.